Dreamy Mathematician Gifts

Mathematics.

'Remember, Edward, inside every 'F' student is a 'D' student trying to get out.'

"Remember when we used to wonder if there other beings somewhere out there?"

"And anyway we'd be no good in bed - I've done the math."

"I love the equation that describes the slope of your nose."

"In pre-school I was an overachiever. Now, in first grade, math is threatening my reputation."

'Very good, Jeffrey! - You are so creative!'

'The math is more complex this year and some of you won't be able to just tap out your answers anymore.'

"Frank, I need your help. The computers are down, but I was told you know how to multiply two numbers together."

'In case of computer bug break glass.'

Sophocles Playwriting School. Euclid and Aphrodite are writing their play together. It must be a love triangle.

"Sometimes I wonder if it was worth all the trouble you went through to get yourself cloned."

"How do you know if you're really in love, Randy?"

"I'm beginning to think that coming up with a password that's never been used may be an unsolvable problem."

"I like you and all, Carl, but you've just got too many problems."

Math/After Math

'My building doesn't allow pets. Do you think the teacher will buy it if I tell her dust bunnies ate my homework?'

"He can't come out to play right now...he's working on his autobiography."

"I don't really have a favourite. I love you both equally."

"Sorry boys, we have to turn back! I left the space station lights on."

'How would you describe yourself?'

Alternative Accountants

How scientists propose

Mathematician listens to a 'PiPod'

Noah falls asleep by counting animal pairs.

'Math is more art than science.'

"Darling, you complete me!"

Junior Accountant

Through the Looking Glass - The Knight's Song

Probability Test.

'I'm your guardian angel and I think it's time you knew that for the past 37 years you've been barking up the wrong tree.'

There were lots of school subjects in the relationship with my first sweetheart. At first it was simple math - one plus one. Then the attraction grew. Oh, lots of chemistry. Economics and geography became a problem. I had no money and her family moved to another town. I ran into her the other day. It was awkward. Ah, I see too much history there!

Why parallel lines never meet.

"When I listen to Mozart, the numbers just seem to crunch themselves."

'It's my theory of probability.'