Dramatic Oracle Gifts

Palmist Alarmist - Uh ooooh!

"To torture an insect or not to torture an insect, that is the question."

"Everything on our menu uses organic, locally sourced, graveyard-to-table ingredients."

Power/Expenditures

Rutger Shower

The Authentic Christmas.

The End of the Property Boom is Nigh.

'Is there a fireman in the house?'

Mime Tug-of-War

Hipster Police Department

'Heathcliff! Oh, Heathcliff!'

'So, did I get the job?'

"We are in the bear's house. Goldilocks has just eaten a bowl of porridge. Papa Bear enters."

"This is very mysterious. I can't seem to pick up anything at all about you, but I see 'Ivan the Terrible' coming to the Thalia."

Poultry Reading: 'Lo, Ye Sky, It Falls! Verily it does, watch ye out!'

"The perfect gift? He's gonna love this! The fact that she thinks I'd even want this makes me question our entire relationship!"

'Want a good read Sex, violence, incest, murder Old Testament.'

"I'm looling for ground beef that's organic, non-GMO, and doesn't contain meat."

I Pagliacci

I told you way back in 2015 that Donald Trump would be the next president. You called it. You predicted every twist and turn of the election. It was eerie. What's going to happen next, Randy? What's going to happen to us all? Trump will fund research where they use my DNA to make everyone super hot and super chill, and we'll all live in sweet, sexy bliss. HOJ. I'm not sure whether I predicted the future, or whether the future obeyed me. So that one's just in case. Good thinking.

They call me the Groundhog of Love. Romantically speaking, I can bring you an early spring. But if you see my shadow, you can expect six weeks of stalking.

"The Bells, The Bells."

'Sit down and be quiet, Margaret! Besides, you can't be 'king' of anything, let alone, 'the WORLD'!'

"I started in advertising, then I wandered in the desert for forty years. Now I'm a screenwriter."

"It's asking for your password."

I had a career in theatre, and television but I quit because I couldn't suppress my passion for insurance sales

"I knew I should have kept my mouth shut!"

"I feel as if everything in my life has happened offstage."

The Death Fires (The Rime of the Ancient Mariner).

Trust the critics. They know best what makes a good movie.

'I'm a former movie star... but all the world's a stage and what I really want to do is direct!'

"I don't know who my audience is."

Forgot your password?

For Pete's sake! Does he HAVE to say 'for whom the bell tolls' every time the stock market closes???

Theatre Mask