Dr. Seuss Enthusiast Gifts

Billy was conflicted and confused.

The wine snobs

You're my Mona Lisa.

I should be a writer when I grow up...

"These aren’t the droids you’re looking for."

'You're going to have your future cut out for you, reading bedtime stories.'

'Where was the TSA?'

I figured out how we can pay for the kids' college tuitions. Do tell. I'm going to leave for a year of self-discovery, which I will chronicle in a best-selling memoir. Oh, but

Goodnight Moon for the Misbegotten

Lady about the cross: 'Now that all of us have trusted Christ, this is our family tree.'

This is the new Director's Cut version of Hansel and Gretel...with additional scenes and three alternative endings!!!

Display of political memoirs books categorized as: 'Non-fiction,' 'Fiction,' and 'Pure Fantasy'.

“He’s timid, very shy. I rescued him from some wacko who tried to steal Christmas.”

"It's true, mommy...the chocolate bunny attacked me - it was self-defense!"

Jacques et Jille

'Pepperoni: Muse of Pizza'

"Good old Frank. He was always thinking of others."

"Well, Mr. Goddam Fancy-Pants Small-Town-Expose hot shot! What makes you think we don't all have lusty, kiss-and-tell memoirs boiling away inside us?"

'He tells me there's one chapter of his memoir titled, 'My Likeable Master'.'

"No Hand Sanitiser"

Drug Testing Unit: 'Uh Oh!'

'Sounds like it'll flop.'

"I was kicked out from another kid's bed. Do you mind if I crash under yours for awhile?"

"We started losing money right around the time we decided to just lazily remake old movies with the race or gender of the main character switched from the original." "We're burning through cash and we urgently need to course correct and try something different." "So we're going to make fresh stories with new and interesting characters?" "What?" "No."

"The problem is you say Nietzsche and expect everything to be just peachy."

"What do you suppose Ken Burns will have to say about all this in 30 years?"

'You understand, of course, that my memoirs must be written in ELITE type.'

"...My daughter, the model..."

Ernie is a documentary filmmaker who tells stories of folks in their professional lives -- I think he should wonk on his film titles more. One film looked at the surprisingly competitive cutthroat world of the dry cleaning business. "The Hanger Games." In another, we see astronomers traveling to remote locations to escape light pollution. "The Dark Night." Ernie showed us the bond among young butchers in an increasingly vegan world. "Stand by Meat"! And he told us the story of a man who i

"And in the beginning Mary begat a little lamb"

Eva Schloss

'That's right...his appendix...and it's pure dynamite! Don't you see? It'll be the ultimate insider celebrity memoir!'

The three Musketeers give a PowerPoint.

'And there is where you put the batteries.'

"... and your great great grand father lost the race but the it was discovered the tortoise was on stéroids."