Double Life Enthusiast Gifts

'I see you've created an online altar ego.'

'Fred leads a double life, and I can't stand either one of them!'

Reach for the Star.

'...We apologise for any inconvenience this may cause..."

"Surgery up here is free!"

"All we have left is standing room only."

"We can't Sunday. We've been invited to 'you know who's' skybox."

'I'm being sent back. I told you I have a great attorney.'

'What he said about judgement day is scary. Maybe we should find a good lawyer.'

"I have 25 patients in my counselling group...Mrs Sherman, Mr Martin, and Mr Martins 23 other personalities."

"I honored her every request except for the last one: 'Harold, please stop making a scene'."

'If we respect each other, contraception makes sense!'

"Before we decide if you can get in we have to watch a film review of your life..."

"I was a primary school teacher. What did you do?"

A Male Angel throwing his Halo as a Frisbee for his Dog to catch.

"Oh nooo, we can't skip church. Why, we'll just sleep when we're dead!"

Gates of heaven

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"As we're here for eternity, I expected at least a television."

"It was meant to be a surprise romantic dinner for two, but to cut a long story short, it's been a recipe for disaster."

'Life is a precious thing, but simply breathing and existing isn't living...the end is inevitable for everything...I'm afraid that time has come for you, dear. I have to pull the plug...'

'Hmmphhhh ... High on Life. Now that's something the government ought to regulate.'

"Yes, this is heaven - but we need some source of funding, too."

'Can't talk now, I'm just going into a tunnel.'

Post-psychoanalysis

"No, you're going to hell - but you're welcome to check out the gift shop."

'Listen, if they didn't have alcohol in heaven, it wouldn't be heaven!'

'Hold on, pal! Who's in control of the narrative here?'

"You get a white robe, a halo, wings, and of course, free WIFI."

"There's corporate me and there's me, and, by God, we both know how to have fun."

"Estoy aqui abajo!" ( I'm down here!)

Heaven

'Boy, that felt good! I can see why the devil has so much fun. And no, I'm not letting you in! But tell him I said hello.'