Donation Droll Pillows

'Still no money, but a lot more IOU's than usual!'

"I'm in nonprofit work for the money."

'I'd like to leave my pacemaker to the medical institute, my artificial lung to the research center, my false teeth to the dental clinic, my dacron arteries...'

The nonprofit dog fight.

'Sorry - I only donate big.'

Maple tree donating syrup at a syrup drive clinic.

Peace on Earth, Goodwill to the less fortunate...

Vicar prays for money for church repairs.

'Nobody's leaving till I get the offering plate back!'

"I told him he was allowed one phone call. He's making a pledge to Channel 13."

"It's that Silicon Valley foundation - they want to know if we'll match our grandson's $100 million donation."

"I don't think you're getting the point of this exercise."

Honey badger do care.

'Dear, it's called a collection plate, not a tip jar.'

"Okay, we've donated to the Food Bank, Feed the Hungry, Food for Life, Hunger Helpers, Starving World, Second Helpings. . . is anyone else getting hungry?"

'Sorry - I've got strong views on Sunday Trading!'

'Good news, men, when we give to the poor now, it will qualify for federal matching funds.'

The next step in human evolution was homophilanthropist.

"And if anything goes wrong I'd like to donate my body to comedy."

'Can I choose which brick you name after me?'

'The problems with charities is that they are always needing donations.'

Give To Tsunami's Victims.

"No, there is not an annual cap on tithes."

'Have you seen my amplifier.'

"Done saving the world for today."

'It was all she had to offer, vicar.'

"The university is delighted with the endowment but is there any flexibility over calling it the 'who's the rich one now you toffee nosed bastards' wing?"

Half of those who made no donations last year 'do not trust charities'.

"Seems to start earlier every year."

"It's a large gift - a very large gift. So the question is: do we rename ourselves 'Aunt Tilly's Frozen Fish University'?"

"It's true we like our members to be regular givers, but irregular givers are certainly welcome."

"Is it a sin to think of them as gives and give nots?"

Santa ringing bell with sign "Give now and avoid the holiday rush."