Domestic Life Humorist Pillows

"But I use all of them!"

"Jordan takes his wife's wind chimes – he shoots!"

"This man has some sort of complaint about the pie his wife ordered, sir."

"No, we're not laying new turf, we're sending the old stuff away to be cut!"

"No, your father's outside fortifying our borders."

'However, on the rare occasion that I find him awake, he can be quite amusing.'

"Dinner will be ready soon, I hear the pizza truck rounding the corner."

'Oh, no!! My husband!!!'

"Goodnight my little treasure"

"Dinner's ready!" "I can't hear you!"

'Good day on Wall Street?'

Woman has man in shopping trolley

"For the last time. . . Stop complaining and get in the bath!!!"

"According to this article, snoring can result in justifiable homicide."

"I feel like pushing the envelope this morning, honey, starting with a little grape jelly for that bran muffin."

"Take me to your Larder!"

"Garbage in, garbage out!"

The wooden clothes horse of Troy.

"The couch hates me Jane!"

"I pray that he will enjoy my pie..." "The smell's enough to make me cry!"

"For God's sake, Lucille. We're IN a vacuum."

"Not tonight. Margie wants to watch some guy deep fry a duck on cable."

"You overwatered the plant, again."

"Mom, Dad, this is Kevin, our new ombudsman."

"You're good mum. But, Billy's mum is a better cook than you. She only knows how to make chocolate cake."

"They're clean Mum, I washed them yesterday."

"Why not pay someone to clean out the gutters?" "Total waste of good beer money." And just like that, Gail became a widow.

"Honey, close the fridge door while you're thinking!"

"I must come to the supermarket with you sometime dear, they seem to sell everything!"

Attack of the 65 - Inch Woman

'I thought you said, 'What happens in the bedroom stays in the bedroom'!'

"My wife, my best friend and our prenup!"

How it started: How it's going

'Don't blame me - It's my husband's cooking!'

"Our cat is the only god this home needs."