Domestic Bliss Enjoyer T-Shirts

'The fire seems to be drawing well.'

Hello from the shed.

"Think about the honey."

'You know that bottle of ink that was standing on the desk...?'

"I'm going to be vacuuming, if you want to go into the farthest room and start asking me questions."

"You don't understand, Mom. Our staying in and watching TV is not the same as you and Dad staying home and watching TV in Dayton, Ohio."

'What's our stockbroker doing in the shower? Quick! Run and get me a rolled up copy of the Wall Street Journal!'

The apartment 5-J Film Festival.

'When did you get a ceiling fan?'

"It's your turn to throw out the dishes."

"Is there something wrong with the TV focus?"

The black cat sat on the mat...absorbing all the heat of the fire.

"Honey, could you pass me the cow."

'No madam, the seat does not keep falling down, to the annoyance of male users, would you like one that does?'

"I said, I had the cat declawed."

"IF you wanted to leave, why didn't you just say so?"

'Dear, I think the plants need watering.'

"The Hewletts have flaming crown roast au vin blanc every Wednesday."

"I'm sorry I used three squirts of washing up liquid instead of two."

"Just empty it."

'If your mom's not happy then nobody's happy, right dad.'

We never go out anymore.

"I guess my wild days are behind me."

Wedding Cake with groom hoovering

'Is something wrong, dear? -- you're home on time for dinner!'

"What are you complaining about? When I met you, you were living in a one-room apartment."

"It doesn't get any more low-maintenance than this!"

'On the plus side she'll be able to help you with the chores.'

"But I'm accustomed to captivity. I wouldn't survive a day in the wild."

"I'm staying in my nightie until 1997."

"That's fine. I've learned to enjoy TV with no sound when we're at odds."

The Brook-Green Volunteer Pt. 8

'Why do you never change these things out when they're empty? They're not an infinite scroll.'

'And that is how you put the toilet seat down. There will be a quiz on Friday'.

Ethel's offer to iron out Ned's problems turned out to be a problem in and of itself....