Doggy Matchmaker Pillows

'Wait, your dog loves treats too? Wow, we have so much in common!'

"...and someone with no fleas. Anything else?"

'It was love at first sight, although he was very pixilated and I was out of focus'

"Oh, God, no, please, no, God, no..."

"Sure, it's more efficient. But I still miss shooting the arrows."

"And there was I thinking you'd been Beta tested."

"Have you tried carbon dating?"

"When the dating agency said you were full of beans..."

'You and Phil make a great couple. You're perfect for each other!'

"She says you sound like 'fun'!"

'Sir, you wanted an affectionate date capable of long term friendship...you said nothing about being allergic to fleas.'

"I don' want another weather forcaster - they're too unpredictable."

Acme Dating Service

"...and if anyone here suspects that the algorithm that put these two together might be flawed, speak now..."

'Top is right! He's a scaffolder working on a tower block'

"AI can now scan dating sites and find your best match."

Match maker

Rescue dog rejecting potential owners

Sidekick speed matching service.

"Ironically, I think I'm experiencing job burn out!"

"Thanks for walking me home."

"Nothing works with this guy. Would you like us to shoot the pool guy?"

"Of all the finger-painting classes in all the day-care centers in all the world, you had to walk into mine."

Body language interpreters - "He likes you and wishes to dance with you." "That's a get lost."

"Here's one - 'Few-bricks-short-of-a-load seeks One-our-out-of-the-water.'."

'Aunt Val's pretty cool. . . Kind of hot actually. . . for an older lady.'

"All the good ones are neutered."

"I don't believe you can't get close to anyone, Mr Jones. Get back over your own side."

Hydrogen nucleus seeks single portion for possible fusion. . . to share conversations on nanoparticle tracking.

"The preacher's wife needs a new hobby."

'Can Laura come out and bark at the moon?'

"Okay. So, apart from being a very shy ventriloquist, is there anything else you can tell me about him?"

"I'd like to meet the algorithm that thought we'd be a good match."

"Blue eyed blonde...let me check the files."

"Rick, here, is totally passive, and you always have to be in control, so I thought you might like each other."