Doggie Dialoguer Gifts

'Don't forget to talk about their dog!'

'Iguana know what time it is.'

Conversation between Dogs.

"I'd hate to see the flea big enough to wear those!"

"You mean, with that yakerpoop app, you can have a service stop by and puck up your bag of crap?"

English Pointers giving pointers.

"How can you just sit there, wrapped in your own safe little world, when you know there are millions of squirrels out there?"

"My owners named me Kvduer92hybH20UDF8fhsj becuase they wanted to remember a strong password for their online banking."

'I told you, never utter that four letter work - 'walk!''

'Play dead.'

'This dingo penpal of his - they're Australian aren't they?'

'Don't keep going on about your cold paws - I've got my own problem!'

"There's no point us both barking."

"He chews his nails, his pencils, his glasses... and I get scolded for chewing his shoes!"

"It's for what?! I thought it was a bark amplifier!

"If I hear 'Who's my widdle snoogie woogums' one more time I think I'm gonna snap."

'He's a nice guy, but he doesn't bite, if you know what I mean.'

"Actually he's not begging."

'His barks's worse than his bite.'

"my people are like 70 in human years."

"Barking can be very affirmational."

"Please. Please just stop barking."

"My mother ate math homework while she was pregnant with me."

"Let's stop pretending we understand the English setters and just turn on the subtitles."

'Great. Nice going. Right in the water.'

"Shed as much as possible. That way your owners will never be able to give you away."

"Personally, I don't think anything is truly experienced until one rolls in it."

'What? You want something? It has something to do with your food dish? Darn, I wish dogs could talk!'

"If this tree is so great, why doesn't he pee on it."

'We're best friends, supposedly. . .? I sleep rough, get tied up, I'm fed left-overs. . . He even snarls at me when I dump. . .?'

"Next time you're acting like you could eviscerate the mailman, I'll remind you that you refuse to even get your feed wet."

'What's his name?' 'He won't say!'

'What's this? 'Registered retriever stud service, your place or mine' then it gives our phone number.'