Dog Person In Denial Gifts

"I'm not a dog person - I'm just a guy with a dog."

The Canine's version of cans tied to the back of a wedding car driving off with Cats attached

'What was all that swerving at the cat walk?'

'Polly wants a cracker! Fetch!'

"More documents to shred? I feel I have more to offer this company than sharp claws."

'The results of your physical exam are fine, except for your reflexes: They're more 'dog-like' than 'cat-like'.'

"I'm down to only one nap a day. From 8 am t0 8 pm."

Balloon dog poos.

'Wait! That's not one of your novelty slippers...that's the cat!'

"What? Don't yuck my yum!"

"It's the cat doc, he scares me."

'I can hold a match to his notebook.'

'Everybody on the internet now knows I'm a dog, so I'm pretending to be a cat.'

"Is that all they taught him at obedience school? How to use a can opener?"

Dog phrenology

Man and dog on exercise bikes.

"Do you guys want to go for a walk?"

"Me, I think Master and Mistress are incompetent: why else would they need a butler, 3 maids, 2 cooks, 5 gardeners, a pool boy and 2 personal assistants?"

"He belongs to a lawyer."

"Don't you worry about me. I always land on my feet."

"He may be neutered and declawed, but he's still dangerous."

'No, no, no. You guys are way off! This isn't even the cat. You guys are on the dog.'

Wonders of evolution: Same face, totally different meaning.

"I vow to never again bat around someone else's fuzzy mouse."

"You are aware that’s a golf ball?"

A day in the life of a dog.

Rats cutting loose a dog so it can chase a cat.

'If you had asked me I could have TOLD you that he bites.'

'(Sniff!)... Hey! Somebody stole my identity!'

'Quick, act like a dog. My friend just busted us.'

"More please."