Dog-loving Diva Gifts

'But I must have bone! I need incentivising.'

A dog gives a woman a birthday card while she plays a harpsichord.

"I'm beginning to think that buy one, get one free is not always a good thing."

"This never happened."

'Fragile little dogs are not supposed to enjoy walks in such weather.'

"Your love gives me strength."

"Humans are strange."

Why Poodles Become Killers

'@#$=%!} paparazzi!'

"The club scene is really changing."

'A bed just isn't the same without a person in it.'

Sonata for Piano and Dog

Dog and family arrive at 'Mount Ruffmore' National Park, instead of Mount Rushmore.

'Oh, he's been a bad dog all right - why else would he lawyer up?'

State of the Art Dog.

Bernice Mountain Dog

"If you don't make up your mind who's taking me out, I'll do it right here."

"Congratulations. It's a litter."

"Technically, He's supposed to generate more energy than he uses."

What female dogs think about their looks.

"We went dutch - he must have reached his two-hundred-dollar dating deductible."

Cats and Dogs.

"I now propose a 5 minute break so we can confide with our dogs."

"He's obedient as long as my requests align with his internal moral imperatives."

Museum of dog memorabilia

'Do you have to do that every time?'

"I'm afraid we'll have to keep him overnight. Are you going to need a loaner?"

Only 4 shopping days till national dog week

"Too goth?"

'I forgot to tell you... he's part Spitz.'

'The fee? Well, let's give the old wheel a spin and see what comes up!'

Bad Dog

"The line in the script was actually 'Woof woof,' but, when we started shooting, 'Bow wow' came out, and the rest is history."

"She's a model dog, alright. When she's not on a catwalk, she demands a lot of attention, requires constant grooming, and is a picky eater."

Village Pet Shop.