Dog Lover Who Dates Gifts

Tinder

"Lassie, go get help!" "Oh Timmy you idiot! Not again!"

Playing Fetch.

"I hope you are enjoying the walk..."

"Hulk no can be mad at Mr. Puppy Face"

"... and I have a follow-up question regarding rawhide."

A Good Batch.

'Someone got me because I matched her purse, I've been to a rock concert, a night club and two weddings, Life as a designer dog is great but I'd trade caviar for kibble to get a good night's sleep,'

"Pick me!"

'I'd say he's 10 percent 'pet' and 90 percent 'Lord and Master of All He Surveys'.'

"I will not lick the principal, I will not lick the principal, I will not lick the principal, I will not lick the principal, I will not lick the principal."

"He's got no clue how easy he has it compared to his ancestors."

'Well, it's your fault for wearing my slippers.'

'Joe took the day off to go to the ball game. So I'll be sitting in for him until he gets back. Would you like me to fetch you something?'

'Sparky, fetch me an impudent little chardonnay.'

'It's a deal, lets sniff bottoms!'

"He was overly socialized as a puppy."

"My emotional support dog ate my comfort food."

"I call it 'Bad Dog.'"

"I figure if I was still employed, I wouldn’t get to spend all this time with you!"

"How long will we, the descendants of wolves, be content with table scraps and belly rubs?"

'When he's happy he can cool the entire downstairs.'

Squirrel Chasing a Dog

"Quick, start the car!"

"A squirrel, impressive! I'm still chasing a stick."

"They think we're their best friend. Just play along with it."

Dog looks perplexed as man has his head out the window taking in the beer smells.

"You go on in, I’m just going to catch up with the moon for a few minutes."

'Shhhh. Fido inherited seventy percent of this company.'

Brian was very proud of his dog.

A sheep dog has stacked the sheep four high - 'He used to be with the circus before he came to the farm...!'

"I think therefore I am." "Bow Wow, Bow Wow, Bow Wow."

"For the girls—Kimberly, Caitlin, Lauren, Cindy, and Tracy. For the boys—Cameron, Christopher, Adam, Jeffrey, and Gregory."

A Copy Editor and His Dog

"Hey, pal, let's hear 'Doggie in the Window' again, and this time play it like you mean it!"