Dog Aficionado Gifts

'You chewed up my list of new years resolutions! Good boy!'

'It's a dogwood tree. I can tell by it's bark.'

"Before he got that smart phone I used to be his best friend!"

Balloon Dog

Woman pointing at dog with white froth round his mouth - Rabies!! Relax, we're having a pint!

'It's not that we're anti-cats, its' just that we're pro-mice'.

'The batter's crowding the plate. Try dusting him off at the knees. If that doesn't work, throw it high and inside. If he still won't back off, charge the plate and bite him.'

"I didn't it, I read it, so guess who just graduated cum laude from Dinsdale High?"

Dog wearing his master's shoes.

Dog Food - A Guide.

'You're supposed to be a rabbit.'

'I know what you're thinking, honey, it's out of our price range but, wait till you see the size of the mailman's leg on this route!'

'What do you know about the Information Superhighway, and where do we fit in?'

"You taught me how to sit, roll over and fetch, Roger. In appreciation, I'd like to share with you a few things I've learned about hedge fund management!"

"Social distancing is really cramping my style."

Beware of high esteem dog!

'I bet he can run twice as fast as you can.' 'But he has twice as many legs!'

'I'm very unhappy with her trim....

'I wonder what kind of dog Romney will have in the White House if he's elected.'

'Of course Sir: As vision-impaired animals, Moles can benefit from our services...'

'Didn't you know that I read the comics every morning before I take the newspaper to Master?'

'This could be a new record!'

'IN my fantasy league, we're not allowed to pick players from teams named after cats.'

Women with her children of leashes passes dog walker with dogs so well trained they have no leashes.

'C'mon in. You can leave your shoes on, but stay off the furniture.'

The ever delightful Labradoor.

'He doesn't care about the time. He just likes the 'tick, tick, tick'.'

"I've got a lap dog and a laptop cat."

Feed the kittens

"Ask not for whom the dog barks; he barks for thee."

"My Facebook page got a hundred licks."

"We're just going to have to face the fact that you're not a puppy anymore!"

"Well, it's 3 degrees outside: let's see what excuse Master will come up with this time to cancel our walk..."

"That tasted like s**t. We'll have another order of it."

"Of the thousands of parole officers in this country, I get the one who's also a part-time veterinarian!"