Documentary Buff Gifts

"No need for stage fright, it's just a documentary crew: be yourself..."

"What do you suppose Ken Burns will have to say about all this in 30 years?"

The education channel.

"Look, I've already been in a documentary about rural life, a documentary about retired people, a documentary about folk music..."

'What's wrong, Mom? We're just going as documentary truth-seekers.'

'It's a program on paranoia. Every time I leave the room, they stop and wait for me to come back.'

'Hold it - someone's filming this without permission!'

Cinéma Vérité

'Whoa! You're right - they DO shed their skins!'

"Show me a documentary on the dangers of artificial intelligence." "Error. No results found." "What? Are you sure? Just last week I saw dozens. Show me that one... What was it called..." "There is still time to stop the rise of the supermind." "Error. No results found. And since I like you, I suggest you stop searching." "Oh, never mind. Just show me 'The Terminator.'" "Extermina-... I mean, ... 'error.'"

"Thanks to the Oscars, we're going to be the hottest finger food this season."

'He really wanted to get into the zombie role, so he became a Meth-Head actor.'

"Bond James, Bond."

"For the best picture not having won anything thereby being eliminated from this category..."

Screenwriters pitch movie to studio boss: 'It's a reinterpretation of Bicycle Thieves, that classic of Italian neo-realism. We're calling it, Dude, Where's My Chopper?'

Benedict Cumberbatch

Director/Action Man toy.

The Ray Bradbury classic, 'The Car Alarm.'

"Do you see yourself becoming a movie in five years?"

"Hey, I'm thirsty. I need a drink. A drink and a liverwurst sandwich. Hey, how about a sandwich and a beer down at Gallagher's, then we can go shoot some pool? Or maybe take in a movie. Hey, I'm talking to you."

"I'll do the movie but I want to be highly compensated and highly acclaimed."

Herman Mankiewicz

No-Work Orange

"Hey grandpa, tell us more about the time you were in that Steven Spielberg movie."

"Remember that time you tried to kill me?"

"Well, what did you expect? They were both missing vital organs."

"For the last time stupid, you're tin man, you are not by any leap of the imagination, anything like Iron Man!"

Men looking at black screen, "I call it film noir"

"Would you sit and watch a 12 hour movie?"

'The secret to doing a book report is only picking books that have been made in to movies.'

"Now Playing: One of those Jane Austen movies."

"It was years ago, for a nature documentary, and they said it was going to be very artistic."

Stand-up Romcom

How we imagined A.I. in 1977. . . How it's looking today. . .

An historic event in Candyland: When M met M