Document Wizard Gifts

Boss talking to lawyer, 'These new Terms and Conditions you've drafted for us are extremely long and overly complex - our customers are never going to be able to understand them. Well done Jones!'

"You've got your corner office, so what more do you want?"

No, I didn't know they were going to cut the office furniture budget in half.

Pounding speeds up the computer.

"Thank you for that summation of the charts."

'You'll have to take an online company aptitude test, but if you're the designer we're looking for, you've already designed an app for that.'

Eldrow

"Remember Mr. Cockbundle is not just a 'customer', he is an important source of valuable and readily marketable data."

Businessman with in and out boxes marked: 'Hocus' and 'Pocus'

'I have a homepage, therefore I am.'

Deadline

'Herb will provide one of his concise interpretations of the quarterly sales charts.'

Library door sign says, 'We have encyclopedias ... the original Facebook!'

Business cartoon about an incentive to complete the paperwork.

Change Management: Change can be ruf.

". . . so, all I really need to do is change one word."

Gerald Ratner's return

Information. Innuendo

Aftermath: Hostile Takeover,

The Move.

"You're in luck...I've unearthed those payroll records from 3 years ago."

In trays read: Bluff/Blink.

'Too long at his desk...we're going need surgery to cut him free.'

In/Out/How did this end up on my desk?

"No, it hasn't anything to do with my presentation. But wait until you see how I hold everyone's attention with it sitting next to me at the podium."

"Do you have a link I can click on that removes me from all future conversations with you?"

'I can't wait for Power Point.'

"Recent research has yielded some frightening results...It turns out we are a business team held forever on a presentation chart, locked away in a supply closet."

"I've got a great idea! By adding the words "and associates" to my business name, no one will every suspect I'm really just one person with a phone and a web site working out of my bedroom!"

This is Pandora, our new Content Manager.

"Yeah, I keep a clean desk. Now all the mess is in the computer!"

'Having all this information on my patient's diagnostics is great, but I think I need a degree in data analytics to sort it all out...'

'Can you redo this manuscript, John, and make it less stupid?'

'First the good news.'

"I'm sorry, but you'll have to get approval from the offices of Terminology, Evidence, Proof of Demand, Documentation, Measurement and Predictions before I can even think about signing off."