Doctor With A Sense Of Humor Pillows

"I'm not very good at delivering bad news so you're perfectly fine."

'My speciality is referring patients to the right specialist.'

"Doctors, Gilby, Beam and Henson. Ears, nose and throat."

Surgery Instructions.

Medical Building Directory: Dr. Larry Nix, Dr. Sally Putty, etc..

Locum GP's to be paid for extra work on the BMA agreement

"Good. Now start it up again."

"If you don't feel better in a few days give me a call and I'll completely ignore you."

'If you're tired of only hearing good news or bad news, we're running a special on 'meh' news.'

"They used to call them G.P.s."

"We've determined that it sucks to be you."

"And I suppost you've never had a friendly wager with a colleague?"

"We found traces of conscience, fortunately we caught it early."

"These aspirin are for me. That patient in room 102 is a real pain!"

"If you phone me, your chances of getting a return call are only one in ten."

'Are you writing my symptoms, or is that your autobiography?'

'On days when the stock market suffers sharp losses... it's best not to mention in recovery.'

'Take that back! - Gynecologists aren't EITHER sissies!'

9 out of 10 doctors recommend keeping their stethoscopes in the freezer.

Heart surgeon tastooing patients heart with "Love".

"If it were painful, could I do this?"

'Maybe it is psychosomatic.'

"That's where the pain gets me, doc."

Medical Books - Lady Chatterley's Liver

"I think you're suffering from nostalgia, Mr. Prentice."

Fly Hospital: "Just a slight stinging then you'll be fast asleep."

'I think it's your colon. I came to that conclusion through the process of elimination.'

'...And my thirty-seventh symptom....'

Fish swimming around inside drip.

"All good: This egg looks healthy as well..."

"Your EKG corresponds with the stock market report."

"It'll have to stay on until your vasectomy heals..."

'I had this two years ago.'

It was only Monday...but Dr Davies knew that it was going to be a long...long week...

Calm down...this is for your own good.