Doctor Dilemmas Gifts

"Can't I go anywhere without someone asking for free medical advice?"

"They want to put up a new cell tower in our neighbourhood?! We don't need more of those radio emission eyesores here! I'm gonna complain... ...as soon as I have better signal strength."

'So, gentlemen, how's the dollar trading against the immortal soul, today?'

'I've been googling your condition and I'm afraid to say...I think I might have it myself.'

"What can we do about this leadership course,,," "I don't know,what do you think" "Isn't there anyone we could ask"

"If we went to war, wouldn't God be on the spot?"

"Just pick one!! We're already late!!"

'Bugger it, we're out of beer!'

'Your dilemma is fabulous. Imagine what a dramaturge could do with it.'

'There are some things they don't teach you in medical school. I think you've got one of those things.'

"And as if that wasn't bad enough. They've discovered that I'm allergic to bandages!"

"I'm running late for totally dignified reasons."

Bothers my conscience a little bit/May keep me up for a night or two/Am I really stooping this low?

Signs left and right read: High tech/low tech.

New Years Reolutions

'I may not be able to smack you, but it won't stop the 'Bogie Man' coming to get you if you are naughty !'

'I see a VERY important note from your doctor. Unfortunately, I can't read her handwriting.'

"Oh shit! What have I done? Undo key! Undo key!"

'I understand you're upset with the insurance company. While my concern is your bottom, their concern is the bottom line.'

"Maybe yes. Maybe no."

Unfinished Business/Mission Accomplished

'That Doctor has a lot of nerve...I've waited six weeks for this appointment and he says, 'you're lucky we caught it in time'.'

'I think your doctor gave you the wrong note, Sir. We don't have any bread and milk.'

Tourist Crossroad

'I should have known better than to tell him to stand in the corner.'

"Should we raise him to succeed by nurturing him, or neglect him so severely that he finds success as a megalomaniacal sociopath?"

"If I need to stop smoking and lose weight...what are you going to do about it?"

"I told you to take three teaspoons daily of the medication, not the spoons!"

"...and then there's the small matter of that ball you planted on the fourth green."

"This afternoon I have to deal with an irritable bowel and a grumbling appendix!"

No decision is a great choice sometimes.

'Want to know how to deal with problem students? Have them sit in front of a computer that's turned off.'

"OK, spare me the lecture! Just tell me where I can buy one of those conscience things I've been hearing about and how much it'll cost!"

Jewish GPS

Conflict