Divine Literature Lover Gifts

"I hope they read the fine print that the audiobook is to be voiced by Morgan Freeman."

"Are you insane?!" The Velveteen Skunk

"That's the guy I hired to read Proust for me."

"Too bad about old Ainsworth. Published and published, but perished all the same."

Bob encounters one of the bugs in the Jean Paul Sartre fan website.

Blue Stockings - Woman revealing herself as author

'Peter the Flying Hippo is my favorite storybook character without any merchandising tie-ins.'

"After years of cartoon rejections, Bill stooped to trying a little shameless product placement."

"Would you like me to annotate that for you?"

The Ray Bradbury classic, 'The Car Alarm.'

"You're going to hate yourself."

The DaVinci Code

'I didn't dedicate my book, A Lifetime of Wine Tasting, to my 3 ex-wives and nine kids, because they made it possible. I did it because they made it necessary.'

Mr. Metamorphosis: "At least this better than waking up as a cockroach."

Thomas Mann.

Captain Ahab searched for a vaccine.

Jean-Paul Sartre

Shakespeare does stand-up comedy in the round.

'Look! The new long awaited, highly anticipated but ultimately disappointing novel by that guy you like.'

Kid in time-out writes 'it was the best of time out...'

"Not to be a motion picture - will remain just a book'

Television Readers.

"My novel is not a doorstop!"

"They've remained remarkably faithful to the text."

Miss, how do you spell "acceptable"? I've Googled every "e" and can't find it.

Robinson decided to name him 'Casual Friday'.

William Shakespeare a.k.a. Francis Bacon, Earl of Essex....

It's Dostoevsky. It's Melville. It's Flaubert. But it doesn't dance.

'Mysteries' section of bookshop reveals secret door.

Horti-Culture

A vampire sitting on a park bench at night feeding bats.

"Your usually vicious sarcasm is weak. Go pump some irony."

Shakespeare was bisexual