Divine Intervention Fans Gifts

'Do you think I like to throw down a bolt and hit the wrong guy?'

"Chaplain, the lord should put warning labels on some of his creations."

"Unbelievable! A tick!"

'It's not for myself, you understand."

"And on the seventh day, God 'choked,' and all hell broke loose."

"According to the breathalyzer, the wine definitely represents your blood."

"Betcha can't hit the same spot twice in a row."

Vicar prays for money for church repairs.

"Just my luck."

'Is this a 'cash for clunkers' deal?'

Remote-controlled Popemobile.

God and His Copilot.

"Yeah, it's a sweet boat Noah, but you're still gonna have to start over."

'Hey, Naomi, remember last week when you said nothing short of a miracle could save MicroTechnoCom from bankruptcy?'

"Honey, could you grab the Bible? I need to double-check something."

The real reason for the hole in the ozone layer.

"For the last time- I can't Rapture you out to the Hamptons."

'Hey, good news, we had a look at the X-rays. Turns out, God is on your side.'

"The Lord has heard your prayers and has sent me to say unto you, shut up about it already."

"Why corona? I thought they were getting a bit too cocky."

"Oh, that's the problem - it was unplugged the whole time!"

"All of my manifestations are currently busy however your prayer is important to me so please..."

'It's just a miracle.'

'This message contains confidential and/or legally privileged information, unintended recipients may not use, copy or disclose any portion of this transmission.'

'Let's go home, coach. If God was going to intervene with a miracle and change the final score to save your job, it would have happened by now.'

'New Charismatic'

Why there are no church hecklers.

Hunter looking frightened with smoking gun. Angel dropping out of the sky.

A Chariot of Fire Takes Elijah Up To Heaven (The Holy Bible).

'Now they're praying for the Sun to stand still - You really should have told them more about physics.'

God throwing a lifebelt.

Invoice.

Clergyman prays for divine intervention.

'Drawbridge ahead'

"Is this your first foray into self-publishing?"