Divine Comedy Connoisseur Gifts

"Sooo....my wife and I saw you from across the bar."

'The History Channel is all reruns.'

Sure, he's a zombie but hey, it's nice to finally meet someone who is more interested in my brains than my body.

"I said the males were 'evolving' – I didn't say they were 'maturing.'"

New and improved! BunkerBuster! Get out of the sand trap every single time - or your money back!!

"I warned you not to use that club...now look, you struck oil!"

'This is one of our most recent vintages!'

'...We apologise for any inconvenience this may cause..."

'Tony, you always try to lead.'

'Things have really livened up down there since You introduced SEXUAL reproduction.'

'He likes to power nap.'

'These goalscoring celebrations are getting out of hand.'

Mrs. Claus has a ladies night out.

Night of the Latkes

"And on the eighth day, God sat back with a scotch and soda and waited for the critical reviews."

"I never knew God was such a sports fan."

'I don't remember predetermining THAT!'

Farm Humor.

Night-time halo

'Which one of you told Glurk to stretch before running?'

'I was hoping you'd sign them 'To my good buddy Moses!''

"Intelligent design...well, duh!"

'Why me Lord?' '...because yo have animal magnetism Noah...'

"On the eighth day, God found a lot of assembly parts left over."

Happy Hour

The Trojan Beagle.

The Snarky District

Emergency Phone.

"You talkin' to me? You talkin' to me? Then who the heck else are you talking... you talking to me?"

'Take of the fruit and eat . . . Well, peanuts actually.'

'I was an egg in the Easter play.'

'Satchel, I have just had a revelation.'

"The yellow spotted green bird, eats its body weight in bugs, and mates once every three years."

"Oh boy charades! I love charades! Something big? Is it a bird? It's sharp! Behind? Above?"