Divine Comedy Connoisseur Gifts

"Sooo....my wife and I saw you from across the bar."

'The History Channel is all reruns.'

'Whe they said 'God is my Judge', I didn't realize He was a real attorney.'

Sure, he's a zombie but hey, it's nice to finally meet someone who is more interested in my brains than my body.

"My dad says we eat honey 'cause it has lots of vitamin Bee."

"I said the males were 'evolving' – I didn't say they were 'maturing.'"

New and improved! BunkerBuster! Get out of the sand trap every single time - or your money back!!

'Tony, you always try to lead.'

"I warned you not to use that club...now look, you struck oil!"

'He likes to power nap.'

'...We apologise for any inconvenience this may cause..."

'Things have really livened up down there since You introduced SEXUAL reproduction.'

'This is one of our most recent vintages!'

'These goalscoring celebrations are getting out of hand.'

Mrs. Claus has a ladies night out.

Night of the Latkes

"And on the eighth day, God sat back with a scotch and soda and waited for the critical reviews."

"I never knew God was such a sports fan."

Night-time halo

'I don't remember predetermining THAT!'

Farm Humor.

'Which one of you told Glurk to stretch before running?'

'I was hoping you'd sign them 'To my good buddy Moses!''

"Intelligent design...well, duh!"

Happy Hour

'Why me Lord?' '...because yo have animal magnetism Noah...'

The Trojan Beagle.

"On the eighth day, God found a lot of assembly parts left over."

'Take of the fruit and eat . . . Well, peanuts actually.'

"I'm weighed down with so many gadgets, I'll need a push to start me off."

'Which wine list would you like, Sir - Classics or Plonk?'

"The yellow spotted green bird, eats its body weight in bugs, and mates once every three years."

"Oh boy charades! I love charades! Something big? Is it a bird? It's sharp! Behind? Above?"

10 Good Things about a Minnesota Winter.

Girl who can't cook meets guys who can't fix stuff.