Divine Comedy Collector Gifts

'You weren't always faithful so some of your prayers went to God's spam.'

Ted’s Cloud

'Whoops! I forgot to warn you about the soft spots up here.'

Occu-Pie Mars

"Now, were those friends of your Gettys or Gottis?"

'You've got bats alright...now we'll just have to determine what kind.'

Build your very own conflict of interest!

'...We apologise for any inconvenience this may cause..."

'What did one flea ask the other?' 'Shall we walk or take the dog?'

'Things have really livened up down there since You introduced SEXUAL reproduction.'

Banana Split...

"And on the eighth day, God sat back with a scotch and soda and waited for the critical reviews."

At home with the Bones...one skeleton yells at the dog chewing his leg, 'now cut that out!'

Frozen Turkey: "I hate to bother you on a holiday but I'm freezing out here. Do you have a heated enclosed space I could rest inside for four to five hours?"

"A GPS! Thanks guys! It's exactly what I need to guide my sleigh...you know, in light of that unfortunate hunting accident."

'I don't remember predetermining THAT!'

'Why me Lord?' '...because yo have animal magnetism Noah...'

'Let's have some fun... give Eve extra memory.'

"The Eggsorcist"

Filet minion

Drink for me and my hot mamma. Now! We don't serve beer. Latte. Two, punk! Decaf. You don't want to see him angry. Also, low-foam and soy milk would be great. You don't want to see him gassy. Can I get one of those little Twizzler sticks to stir it with? Cube of brown sugar, please. And one nonfat blueberry scone! Two! I'd like to see how John Wayne would've ordered a fancy coffee drink.

'It's not for myself, you understand."

E-Baying @ The Moon

'Big sale at the Dog Store. Buy 1, get 2 free.'

"It's cool – God told us to!"

Snowmobull

Turtle Hat

"What? You broke number 3 already?"

'Crushing empty beer cans is for wimps.'

Zeus's Caddy

"This Adam and Eve thing -- Is there a warranty?"

"Oh no. Is that my ex?"

"This is a great school but it wasn't my first choice."

A trevor of trainspotters

'I reckon we need a new sweeper.'