Dive Devotee Gifts

I love swimming.

Dive in...

"Ya know, 'DUH' can be a very hurtful word."

'Dr.Sall Thompson got so excited over the new spring design she took a quantum leap!'

"I don’t know what your invention’s called, but it’s really irritating."

'I haven't been able to come to grips with it. My hands are too small.'

'I wonder why scuba divers always fall backwards off their boats.'

'Hey, you! -- What happened to the pet dinosaurs we left here?'

"Bonk!"

A woman takes a pterodactyl on a run.

You're the olive in my martini

'You know, I never have had a sabbatical....'

Pub restrooms; Thugs - Thugettes

'Of course, I'm not one of those glamorous paleontologists who are all over TV these days.'

"I'd call that 'A victory for science.'

Arms race - USA and Russia.

"He chases submarines."

Boy asking for bathing machine to be taken out deep so he can dive in.

'Put that down your fool! It's a bone of contention.'

"Man does not live by chips alone. There's also guacamole."

Two men in T-shirts, one shirt says Jesus loves me, the other Jesus loves me more.

"But you both can't be the 'father' of Ammonium Pentoxide Phosphate."

"Alarmingly, after five minutes the pool had come no closer."

Some people save stamps or coins. I save whales.

'...and they were carnivorous.'

War and Peace

"Unfortunately, extinction was inevitable for the Have-a-need-for-speed-asaurus."

"If you're going to write a review, don't forget to mention our generous portions."

'He's a pretty good pet, except for the 'walkies' part.'

Utilosaurus

"For all we know, a giant meteor could fall out of the sky and eradicate us all. So what do you say we make a little prehistory together?"

How to survive the coming crash.

Holocene, Pleistocene, Pliocene, Miocene, Oligocene, Eocene, Lettuce, Tomatoes, Onions.

Give Thanks.

"Then write it up for The Journal of Surprising Discoveries."