Disorder Devotee Pillows

"You've probably already guessed, ...I'm the bluebird of sloppiness."

"Ya know, 'DUH' can be a very hurtful word."

'Dr.Sall Thompson got so excited over the new spring design she took a quantum leap!'

Thomas Hardy

"Bonk!"

KAWAII T'AI CHI

"My lessons on Enlightenment are a prerequisite to my graduate-level course on Investing in Derivatives."

"I'd call that 'A victory for science.'

Two Daleks fighting

'What a control freak!'

'I'm stressed: My dad was a champion, my mum was a champion, there's a lot of pressure on me to become a champion...'

One book... One book... One book...

'You'll be very happy here...I know I am!'

Post-psychoanalysis

As years of unspoken tension surfaced, Trunky refused to raise his hand like a coward.

"But you both can't be the 'father' of Ammonium Pentoxide Phosphate."

'My best friend threw her bouquet to me at her wedding, and I ATE it!'

"Oprah is definite, Barnes and Noble is giving you front windows, and Norman Mailer has agreed to a feud."

"And if you look to the right you'll see what happens if you disrupt my class."

"In a nutshell Mr. Beesley, you have hypochondria."

"I try to get a head start on them."

'You know, sometimes I find it pretty hard to imagine these will be the ‘good old days.''

Give Thanks.

Man to lady: 'Prisons are overcrowded, so we're seeing more sentences of timeout instead.'

"Then write it up for The Journal of Surprising Discoveries."

Woman protesting to Free-Kirk pastor about a church organ

'Now that's devotion. Two broken arms and still working.'

'It was a split decision.'

'Boys will be boys, but principals will also be principals!'

'Doctor, I just can't seem to relate to my prenup anymore.'

Thriller of the Week

"I find it difficult to like him. He's too good at being humble."