Disillusionment Detective Gifts

"These aren't pearly, just emulsion on wood...."

Man in office, desk covered in computer equipment, uses floor for photos, desk pads etc.

"Tee-Hee! Working like a charm!"

'I've forgotten the author and title - do you read minds?'

Incognito Bonito - 'I don't know me, but I do know you!'

"Miss Jenkins, e-mail the housekeeper. Her telecommuting days are over"

"So yes, I bit him! How was I supposed to know it was Master wearing a red fat-suit and a fake white beard?"

'As far as we can tell, the system went down because someone stepped on a crack in the sidewalk.'

60 minutes I.Q. test - pick the counterfeit.

Jean, bring me everything we've got on gravity.

"Has anyone considered that maybe his dress was a disguise?"

'He's a cheat I tell you - it's just a trick!'

'Miscellaneous' and 'Non-Miscellaneous' trays

"It's a setup."

"Are you feeling okay, Dennis? Your obituary is in the paper."

'Vice squad - you're busted.'

"Really, Mr. Stevens, this fantasy of being turned into a giant frog is absurd. We both know there's no such thing as a curse, and you can't seriously believe your mother-in-law is actually a witch. . ."

"It turns out our health plan does cover eyeglasses."

"I'm an atheist. I don't believe in programmers."

"That's Gilbey's hat and Gilbey's binoculars, but that's definitely not Gilbey."

We have control of you brain.

Arnold's clone refuses to workout: 'You're a huge disappointment, dude.'

"See...polystyrene!"

"We need to talk about procrastination."

"So in other words, we're hoping to discover what makes the nitty, gritty."

'Take a look at this everyone - it just could be the signature we've been looking for.'

'And that's your idea of a desk calendar...'

'Did you see who pushed you?'

"They're not home.."

The Sleep of Reason Produces Bureaucracy

Federal witness protection agency.

'Aaaaaaaaawwwwww!'

"He's not a big, bad wolf, Gramps - he's a predatory insurance agent!"

'I actually find my Ghillie Suit a better camouflage option than my stripes...'

"President Whipple couldn't make it."