Disconnect Champion Pillows

"Nope. I came here to relax and not check my messages."

"I'd like a week off without any business related e-mail on my home computer."

Couples' therapy

Distance to avoid contagion

"It takes a few days for them to detox from screens."

My phone is synced with my tablet, my tablet is synced with my laptop ... but none of them are synced with me."

WHO checklist

Paranoia vs Social Currency.

"Marriage is driving me crazy and she's my designated driver!"

'He has a very open mind. Everything goes in one ear and out the other.'

"You never seem to hear a word I say to you!"

"Behold, Penny. The 'Wi-Fi dead zone.'"

Procrastinator's Leap.

"After endless delays, boarding confusion and lost luggage, it appears he's finally arriving at his conclusion."

"Lately she refers to me as her 'insignificant other'."

"How long has your husband gone through life with these 'blinders' on?"

"Please hold my calls."

"Before we got married you said you were oversexed."

"Apparently women use twice as many words per day as men do."

'Hey, we are roughing it out here! Only 45 minutes of IMing a night, you hear me?'

'Slow Internet connection! They thought of everything!'

Man: 'What the...?!' / 404 ERROR!

"Hello... I will be your instructor for this assertiveness training course... that is... I mean... if you don't mind!"

'For an interactive experience press the off button now.'

'I'm going to restate what he just said - especially the part about my being a good listener.'

"Actually, I am underwater."

Like me on Facebook?

Stay at Home, Save Lives, Coronavirus.

"The end is near." "Ya think?"

You're fired, Figby. If you've given us the best years of your life, we don't want to see the worst!

"Your sermon had everyone at rapt attention. Good move cutting the church WiFi."

Assertiveness training - man answers phone; 'Can I get back to you? How about when I'm darned good and ready?'

"He asked if we had someone on staff who knew sign language and when I said 'yes'....he fainted!"

Social Networking or Death

Social distancing in the desert