Disconnection Advocate Pillows

"Please hold my calls."

"Everyone at Megadrug is committed to the benefits of spoken therapies, which is why we developed 'nitrazone' to enhance the experience."

"I'd like a week off without any business related e-mail on my home computer."

"It takes a few days for them to detox from screens."

Mr. Briggs' Pleasures of Housekeeping, part 1

'David, can't you speak for yourself?'

"We need to complain to Earth's tech leaders about going wireless."

"Behold, Penny. The 'Wi-Fi dead zone.'"

"You say you know at last where you made the wrong turn in your life. You never told me you made a wrong turn in your life."

"Mom, can we get a pet so I can use its name in answering a password security question?"

"I've forgotten your face but I remember your mask."

'I told you that nobody would show up.'

"You're not distancing."

'I'm self isolating, you idiot!'

Man: 'What the...?!' / 404 ERROR!

"Not so much fun being people-watched back, eh?"

"What do you mean 'Get her to stop'?...Your baby's a human being and she already has things she wants to tell you. Crying is the only language she knows. Just hold her tell her 'I hear you'...and grow a thicker skin! Baby tears aren't little grenades, loser!"

'You need to be more accessible to your employees... so you'll need to get rid of the moat.'

'...Plus thirty days for not turning off your damn cell phone!'

"The end is near." "Ya think?"

The Off-line Store

"No cell phone, no e-mails... boy, I've never felt so free1"

"I cancelled the cable, turned off the phone, shut down the internet... where the hell am I??"

Ask Me about my Break from Social Media

New Normal People

Christmas during a pandemic.

The only guy left who's not online.

“So much for Google Maps.”

"Is there something you'd like to talk about, Gerald?"