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"It was a stimulus check impulse buy."

"IT caters to the artsy types."

"This is a lovely old song that tells of a young woman who leaves her cottage, and goes off to work. She arrives at her destination, and places some solid NHHS in a flask containing 0.50 atm ofammonia, and attempts to determine the pressures of ammonia and hydrogen sulide when equilibrium is reached."

Jazz quartet, piano, bass, sax and drums

'Half-baked beans, low fat variety' "Who says we have no taste?"

Grand. Baby Grand. Toddler Grand. Teen Grand.

Karataoke

"Alexa, play Thriller by Michael Jackson."

'Ok you two, where the hell is Dancer?!'

Plum jam...

The Woodstock Medical-Emergency Tent - 1994

'By Jove, we've finally found it! the fabled elephants' disco!'

"I see Joe Bosco passed away." "Yeah. I heard he laid down the boogie and played that funky music til he died."

"Iggy Pop? More like Iggy Grandpop."

No one knew it, but Gerald was about to execute what he called 'The Move.'"

"Those are the lyrics? How embarrassing—I've been singing it wrong this whole time."

"Krill, baby, krill."

"Oh no, we've been inned."

Saxophonist playing on the map of Cornwall.

Old Book Smell

...As we know, Jesus was a carpenter... but I don't think he actually sang on any of their records..."

Disease-y Top

"You're close, but you're not the record. The record for one family in one booth—all from out of state, each ordering a complete breakfast—was set in 1978, with fifteen."

It's Whitney Houston....We have a problem!

Disco Owls

For the musician strapped for space...the Murphy piano.

An Intimate Union forms between Napster and the Pygmy Sub-Area of Central Africa...

"Imagine There's No Heaven. It's Easy If You Try..."

Snake Charming

'I'd like now to do a blues number, for those of you here on Viagra. It's called - Woke up Early One Morning.'

Shake it like a Polaroid picture...

'In a slight change to the programme, the second year jazz quartet aren't playing 'Hello Dolly'. They are however playing truant!'

"When I said I wanted socks, I obviously meant I wanted a multi-room sound system with voice activated management."

"Every once in a while he gets nostalgic for Woodstock."

French Animal Noises.