Disaster Seekers Gifts

'It's freaky. Your house is completely destroyed while - right next door - the neighbor is spared...'

"I dunno, looks like a trap."

'You'll find there's no middle ground with Kirk Knoland.'

'You don't think you're just a tad overprotective?'

'I don't give advice. I'm only up here because it's safer.'

Experts through the ages.

"Not enough money is being spent on safety, so be careful."

"Are there any extra crew on board? He still looks hungry."

Eureka

'I foresee an and to our global troubles ... The world will end tomorrow.'

'So the guidance suggests that if anyone threatens you, throw it them.'

'Do you ever get this weird, primitive yearning to sit behind a large block of wood?'

A safe is about to fall on an unsuspecting man interested in risk-free investments.

'Just putt the dang ball, already!'

The Great Maldini and his Venomous Snakes

"What, no day spa? And you call this a luxury bunker."

Maybe next tiime you'll hand in the risk assessment on time

"Looks like something exciting is happening in R&D."

Award-Winning Photographer.

Turtle crashes, deploys airbag.

"Ideally we're keen to go somewhere that they're not trying to kill us."

Storm chaser van with satellite dish and Storm in a teacup chaser van with cup & spoon.

"Yee yee hee hee how how yip yip."

Big bumpers.

"I'll have a gluten-free, hypoallergenic vegan cookie with whipped hand-sanitizer topping."

"I remodelled, but I left it so that when danger threatens I can still take refuge in the redoubt."

Laboratory- risk assessor

"If the pandemic wipes out the locusts, and the floods take care of the drought, then we may not have to take any action at all."

Knife-thrower.

'I'm okay with this... I'm not a risktaker.'

"If your instincts tell you to go out in a shark infested ocean then go. My instincts are sending me to a nice little aquarium out in the suburbs."

'No, you cannot borrow the car.'

'Dont' operate any rocks or sticks while you're using this medication.'

Fireworks Stand: 'Safe, but INSANE Fireworks.'

'I'm taking a poll. Do you feel safe in your own home?'