Disappointment Humorist Pillows

"Surprising me- that's your life's work."

"Hang on, isn't this the second pair of zebras we've had today?"

"The Eggsorcist"

"Don't worry, Miss. I'll soon get the hang of it."

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The mysterious ancient stone figures of Keister Island.

"This new system is too complex...pass it on."

"Times are perfect for us masochists!..."

"So, Owen tells me you guys met in art school."

"It's not my fault - how was I to know you'd look scary with your clothes off?"

Artist uses connect-the-dots canvas to paint nude model.

"Marlowe filled the crooked gumshoe full of lead. He watched the smoke from his .38 coil in the air as he… mommy’s behind me, isn’t she?"

Nude conductor of Orchestra conducting 'The full Monte-verdi'

'I think we're going to have to add another storey downstairs...'

"Gracie, you're a good mud artist."

'Cannibalism has always repulsed me - until i tasted Aunty Judy's knees'

'Due to budget cutbacks, we need to get by with less.'

Music Quiz

"I like a diet rich in surfers."

"He is stingy. If he is giving gold it's only because prices have hit rock-bottom..."

'It says this artist is making a statement about man's struggle with the rising cost of oil paint.'

'Hell's freezing over. The only thing I can figure is McWit Construction actually finished a job on time.'

'Excuse me, sir, I know you didn't get your bonus, your house is mortgaged to the hilt, you have two kids in college, your employer is facing bankruptcy and . . .'

'Don't you hate people who blatantly use office parties to network?'

Shy Man at Party

'Can you dance?'

"Wow, 27, not bad! Me, I've ruined 53 surfing competitions..."

Convergent Fauna

'Personally, I thin the downsizing went too far.'

Death model.

'Violin in the shape of a nude.'

"I didn't see anything! I swear!"

Artist, sitting in front of a sign identifying a bridge as a draw bridge, draws the bridge.

'I can't afford those prices so would you call me when France goes broke and devalues its currency?'

"Can you hear me now?"