Diploma Day Dreamer Gifts

"What does he know, and how long will he know it?"

'I had no idea there would be a test.'

"I still haven't decided if I want to be unemployed as an English major or as a Communications major."

"I like going to school...and I like coming home from school. It's all the stuff in the middle that gives me trouble."

'Remember, Edward, inside every 'F' student is a 'D' student trying to get out.'

"Make a lot of money."

Continuing education.

'It says I missed freshmen Orientation and I have to take it in summer school in order to graduate.'

Exam

'I'm sure that you are highly qualified. It's just that we're not hiring anyone at the third grade level.'

"I want a top education, but don't milk me dry with school fees."

'So what are you studying, young man?'

"This statement from your headmaster says that you can easily get a good degree...your bank manager says you can't."

I'm getting ready to apply for college. Do you have a list of party schools?

"Is there any way I could get a dashboard instead of a report card?"

What do MD and PHD mean? It means the doctor owes a lot of money in student loans.

'Congratulations, you graduated.'

"At these tuition prices an acceptance letter is pretty much a denial."

'Your pediatrician? No. . . I'm your baby's college admissions representatives.'

"Graduation day at kite flying school."

"I really love school. There's only one problem. I think not having a college degree is holding me back."

"Okay...tell me again what training seminar we sent Bill to?"

"I'm pre-law and pre-med. That way if I foul up I can defend myself."

'I wish his guidance counselor spent more time on college plans and less time suggesting names for his band.'

"My papie says I'm going to be the first in my family to go to college!"

Good luck in your A Levels.

"Okay, you still have all the old problems, but we're adding new ones and you can't touch.

Grim Reapers sitting their 'Finals'.

"Your father would be able to afford to send you to a good college if only he had listened to me when he was your age!"

"I've been studying reverse psychology at Tonga Tech Online University."

'I can't take Barbie to Show and Tell...she doesn't have a thing to wear!'

'Congratulations! And please give your parents this receipt for $148 thousand.'

'OKAY, okay Sandra, I'll PAY for your University course. But it BETTER NOT cost me an arm and a leg!...'

'Homework done only $1.00' 'Homework eaten only $0.50'

'And here's my collection of stock in DiscoCorp... or as I call it, your college fund.'