Dinner Time Detective Gifts

GREAT MYSTERIES OF THE WORLD: Suddenly Warren ate up all his dinner.

'I couldn't stand the heat, so I got out of the kitchen.'

"I'll have the Investigator's Special."

'I know! It's what I had last night for dinner.'

"I like to sit facing the room to see if anyone seated after us gets served before us."

"And how is last week's tilapia tonight?"

'Waiter, there's a Fly-Agaric in my soup.'

"I think you should be aware that the chef is a summer intern."

"We add an eighteen percent gratuity for parties of six or more."

'This fortune cookie says 'buy oriental tea futures'...'

'Dinner will be ready soon -- the submarine sandwiches are soaking now.'

"No dessert until you finish your dark matter."

"Hey!-This looks like a good place!"

"I'm Todd, your waiter, and I'd like you to think our friendship is more than contextual."

"And finally the chef's surprise - the check!"

'Welcome home, Dear. Your dinner is in the popcorn bowl.'

"How did I find my lamb chop? Well, I lifted up a roast potato and there it was."

Rare Medical Conditions - The compulsive desire to work out restaurant bills correctly

'I said, 'I'd like to see the chef!''

'I have a bad feeling about this place, Watson... and I smell a rat!'

"How 'local' is the fish?"

"I'll have your check in a moment, sir."

"Don't tell him anything."

'Mine was stone cold.'

How is your soup, sir? Speaking for myself, it looks pretty good. I can't speak for the fly, of course.

"You can tell it's a classy restaurant - they're ignoring us with panache."

'No, I don't need a doggy bag, but how about a kitty bag?'

'No, there's nothing else: At this time of year, we eat salmon!'

"Yes, a table for three: me, him and his ego."

Plane with banner shoots at another.

'No, no... I ordered a tart, not a tort!'

'Well, that's the last of the garlic repellent.'

"This place is slipping. The 'Chef's Surprise' looks more like a cook's confusion."

"To prevent any complaints like "when will our ordered food be served" guests can now follow the work in the kitchen on TV."

'We're at an Italian restaurant this time, Kevin -- those are breadsticks, not giant-size chopsticks.'