Dinner Host Extraordinaire T-Shirts

Daisy knew that this was her moment

"Sorry, Damocles - at out dinner parties we always sit boy, girl, boy, girl."

Grace For Flies

"I know you didn't order the snails, sir. They're complimentary with the salad."

'..and we thank thee for these bio-engineered vegetables..'

'Sorry sir, we've run out of parmesan cheese.'

"Oh, boy, hard-core sugar!"

"Rump roast?"

'On the contrary... I'm too tough for the steak!'

Party time.

"Again, are you sure I didn't mention about bringing your own 3-D glasses?"

'Thank you so much, but I just followed the directions in the cookbook.'

'Would you like you steak WITH or WITHOUT a capella?'

Horn of Leftovers

"Gesundheit!"

"Oh, it's alright. You couldn't know that I'm honey-intolerant."

'Giles is a surgeon who likes to bring his work home with him.'

"Yes, he is a celebrity chef, but he doesn't have any opinions on Iraq."

'I said, I don't know about you, but I'm a bit disappointed in the strolling musician.'

'I'll be conducting Mahler 3 as the guests arrive.'

A little sharpener before dinner, darling?

"My client greatly regrets the incident with the carving knife. However, in her defense, 14 people were coming for Thanksgiving and her husband, who had just one job to do, bought only 8 rolls."

"I thought we agreed that the dining room was a buffer zone."

"A little lamb please."

"This meal tastes just like dog crap!"

"Let that breathe a little. But not too much. My last bottle hyperventilated."

'You talk about her so much. Why don't you invite that Alma Mater of yours to dinner sometime?'

"Here's to a great post-meal nap."

"Would you mind telling me why you keep hitting a scary-music sound bite every time you pick up your steak knife?"

'This soufle is hard.' - 'No it isn't, your teeth are soft.'

'If you mean Janet, she works the late shift.'

'I'm in the mood to cook!'

"My bouche was not amused."

"Appetizer is almost done."

"I worry about every little thing. Barry's more of a generalist."