Dining Enthusiast With A Legal Flair Gifts

The attorney's Blue-Plate special: Red Snapper, embroiled in a hot legal dispute.

Solicitor speaks legal jargon and has a translator who tells client: 'You haven't a hope!'

"Stephen and I are today's special."

'I'll have the crab cake, and he'll have the crabby cake.'

"The chef is going to need more than just your ‘compliments’ tonight … he’s in one of his moods."

"You'll love this. It's swarthy yet munificent, didactic and gregarious with hints of dogma."

Too Many Lawyers Spoil the Broth

'We don't 'skimp' on the pour, sir; we're just generous with the glass.'

'I request an postponement, Your Honor -- I have to study for my bar exams.'

"Your Honor, we're going to go with the prosecution's spin."

"Tonight, perhaps Mrs. Lewis would prefer this quiet little table for two from which to send back her entrée?"

"This is a neighbourhood vigilante area."

Next time, a larger tip for the server and less free tax advice.

"Which wine would you pair with the complimentary bread and butter?"

'No, I'm not the sommelier; in fact, I don't even work here - I've just always wanted to try this wine.'

Ruth Bader Ginsburg - Forever Supreme

'He doesn't ask for a menu... he asks for an estimate!'

"Have you decided on what you'd like to have?"

"I can't go much longer without your asking why I'm vegan."

'Hey, pal... do you have a wine that tastes like beer?'

"Well I wouldn't eat it, but don't let that put you off."

"Anything but milk and cookies."

"Waiter, there's a hare in my salad!"

'Do you want your zebra de la margola rare, medium or well done?'

"We'll start with the appetizer, move on to the entree, and then finish up with dessert."

'In case of fire, don't panic, pay your bill then run like hell.'

'Wow! I never before saw such a strenuous objection.'

"Waiter, this is the worst meal I've ever tasted. And believe me, I've eaten some crap!"

The ecumenical dinner party.

'What'll it be?'

"Can I tell you about a few items that aren't on the menu?"

Am Awful Crammer.

'George, you're supposed to be tasting the wine, not seeing what effect it has.'

"You and your daft inventions."

Steam from dinner in restaurant forms dollar sign