Dining Drama Queens Pillows

"House red, sir?"

"Yes I know, and you dropped sauce on your shirt."

'We'll get our food....eventually.'

"I'm not trying to freak you out, but your eel roll is moving."

'The tax and tip I understand, but what's this charge for shipping and handling?'

Waiter: 'Your Tossed salad Ma'am.'

'Trouble cutting pickled onions.'

Woman on diet being chased by temptation.

'I hear there's a fly in your soup?'

'No more beans this week, I think, Matilda.'

"What will change my life?"

"Waiter, there's a fly in my soup, and ironically, there's also a crouton in my s**t."

"How was the food sir?"

How to keep your man healthy: 'No sex 'til you eat your vegetables!'

"Hi again. Can I just check whether you enjoyed me interrupting your meal five minutes ago to ask whether you were enjoying your meal?"

'Still antsy about the new diet I put you on?'

"How's everything?"

"Waiter - this dish doesn't contain enough adjectives..!"

"Good evening, my name is Hank. I'm your waiter tonight. This is Eddy, he is our cooks' lawyer."

'I was doing REALLY well, and then I sleepwalked last night and at a 20-pound bag of potatoes!'

"Here are Monsieur Limace, our sommelier, Monsiere Juron, chef de Cuisine and Mr Kruigshenk, specialist for the beheading of breakfast eggs."

"Why do you always fall for these totally unobtainable types?"

"Why, yes, I am 'still working on that.' You know what I'm not working on? Your gratuity!"

"Now the teeth! Huge...savage teeth!!"

"Quick! Tiptoe out and phone the Fire Service!"

"I had to bite him once, but now I always get a great table."

'A fly in your soup, eh? -- Call me if it gets any worse.'

'Can you send this back to the kitchen. It's cold.'

Fly at the tennis club cafe.

"There, dammit. Is that enough pepper for you??"

'If you're in a hurry, why did you order the snails?'

'You did ask for the wine steward - now grovel, man, grovel!'

Servant girl being told off for wearing her hair down in curls