Digital Wellness Warrior Gifts

"I'm so much more relaxed since I got this mindfulness app."

"What did you say about the health of my gut biome?"

"Okay, now breathe another sigh of relief."

Self help acupuncture

Dietician to man: 'To address your spare tire we must first get in touch with your inner tube.'

"I got a gold star for going the longest without looking at my phone in class."

'Well, well, well...'

Be Healthy

"Your contents have shifted."

"Your bad cholesterol is trying to persuade your good cholesterol to switch sides."

"Another one so relaxed, she couldn't walk out of here."

Kid with 'Little Wellness Facilitator' kit

"Breathe in and reimagine yourself in a world where you lived a healthy lifestyle."

"Nice try, Jim, but there's no such thing as a 'Beer cleanse'."

Treat Dispensers for the Middle-Aged

FIGHT STRESS: Walk-A-Thon

Shrinks in heaven

"You're in perfect health and look half your age – I'm prescribing something to help you shut up about it."

'Miss Raleigh. I'm studying megatrends. Bring me some megavitamins.'

"And lastly, for my infinite perseverance, self-control and fortitude, I'd like to thank the Internet trolls."

Making healthy substitutions at mealtime

'What are you eating now?'

'You've still got the right stuff, only now it's in the wrong places.'

Healthy living has added years to Melvin's life.

Burnout Syndrome...

"Would you like me to give it to you straight or sugar-coated?"

'C'mon, c'mon! I want to be the first one on the stair-climbing machine!'

Traditional vs alternative medicine.

'Mom, do I have to hold my plank through desert, too?'

'According to these latest tests, anything can cause anything.'

'As a matter of fact, I have the heart of a 30-year-old woman.'

'Your blood pressure is extremely high - your resistance to things that cause it, extremely low!'

"I'm going on a little mental-health walk and you're not coming with me."

Internet Cafe.