Digital Vs Print Debater Pillows

"It's like the ancient internet, printed out."

The Proust of Twitter

Who should I call first? 911 or Technical Support?

"Perhaps in my next life I'll be a jpeg."

"Honey, come quick! This guy in the comments section just solved the Middle East crisis."

"I had a great weekend... My Grandpa talked about the war again and my Dad about his most daring facebook comments!"

'We're beta testing Goo-Goo Glass.'

'I can watch T.V. shows on the computer, so who needs a TV?'

What'r We Doing Today, Daddy?

"They say it's the first sign of aging - not being able to keep up with new technology."

'I've taken the liberty of simplifying the latest data.'

"Not now, honey. Daddy's arguing with strangers about the sexual orientation of puppets."

'When I was young we didn't have the interweb at our fingertips. . . we had to go to the library to get our questions answered!'

"I know you're wrong, I just can't get the computer to say it yet."

"I can tell you about this article or you can just read the comments online."

Modern Nursery Rhymes

'Darling you'll be so proud of me, I've just written my first email. Now I must rush to get it in the post.'

Mousetrap has captured the wrong type of mouse.

'Doctor, I just can't seem to relate to my computer equipment these days.'

'Don't internalise that simmering rage -- get it out of your system on website comments sections.'

"My computer doesn't understand me!"

"No you can' 'google' number seven!"

"Yeah yeah, nice, but how many online followers do you have?"

"The hive mind has reached a consensus about 'Wolverine'."

"Of course you're not a failure - lots of people don't know how to tweet."

Jesus forgets to save.

My dog ate my flash drive, and that's where I stored my homework.

"None of this seems to be doing me any good at all!"