Digital Security Consultant Gifts

"Gimme all your Bitcoin!"

The Future: "Sorry, but I have to show you an ad now."

The Anti-Agent

Robots search for people's personal information in the cloud.

"The report is clear that cyber crime is on the increase, it's a worry."

'Who changed the password to 'arf'?'

"Always remember, sweetheart, that when the service is free, YOU'RE the product!"

Password Error: Snow White and the seven dwarfs not recognised as eight characters.

"My hackers just collapsed your country's economy."

Super Strength, Impervious to Bullets And Explosions

"That's odd. I visited an antibacterial soap website, and my computer got a virus."

"Don’t you eyeball me, Ed! That’s right, look down at the table. Only technicians who remember to back up the data can look at me! And if you start to cry I will fire you!"

"No, Mother, I don't think Julian Assange is going to leak your recipe for fruitcake."

"You work well without supervision? Fat chance of that happening in here!"

"Check the setting. I'm sure the CIA isn't hacking into our appliances just to burn your toast."

'Mark my word, Walters, this is no ordinary virus.'

"Of course, if they ever start to suspect all their TVs are watching them back, we may have problems."

"Good heavens William, what have you downloaded off the internet this time?"

'Hey, what happened to my cookies?'

Shaped Much Different: Vietnam and Afghanistan.

"It's a fantastic computer! It's so old that none of today's hackers know how to hack it!"

"Looks like Brandon got caught with his hand in the password jar."

"Careful! He knows computers."

"Don't deny it. You only wanted me for my metadata."

Do you have a phone with recording capabilities? I want to be able to carry a wire when I meet with my boss.

'We're looking for somebody to work on our new top secret project. Can you tell me what kind of experience you have?'

'...And, from what I understand, they don't have any hard drive at all.'

Roger Buffle Jr. supplies his father with yet another computer password.

"Thanks for considering me for the job as head of cybersecurity, but I already hacked into your network and gave myself the job."

"So who is this First pet?"

Cyb-R Safe: Offering the most convincing illusion of on-line security available today!

Clickbait

"Honey, are we watching TV or is it watching us?"

'Kumor's responsible for all the computer passwords, so the boss had him encrypted.'