Digital Recluse Gifts

"Social networking lets me be social without actually having to be around other people."

"He spends 24/7 behind that computer of his. I guess he lives in a fishbowl, too."

I wish I could experience a normal, social interaction...

"I'm kind of a big deal in antisocial media."

DO Not Disturb (Except For Meals)

"I got 30 likes but Mom's was not one of them."

'I love my new easylife artist's easel.'

#Whyneighborsdon'tknowtheirneighbors

'I think I'll stay in and try to catch up on my reading.'

'Who said romance is dead? I just downloaded a screensaver with red roses and chocolates for your PC!'

'It's a sign of the times, a high rise block of caves reserved for hermits.'

"Out of all your 277 passwords, not once did you use my name. Are you losing feelings for me?"

"I've got a better view on my smart phone."

'I hear he's quite a recluse - doesn't even have a blog.'

System failure - calling for sysadmin...

Martin hated dining alone – but loved the savings.

"That's it sorted then - this year we'll spend a fortnight in the spare bedroom."

"Just sign it, or I'll post YOUR old report cards on social media."

"But you told me you were on gardening leave, so why can't you come and help me in the garden?"

"I didn't mind that his Valentine was a e-card. The big letdown was getting the box of e-chocolates."

"Meet JD Salinger's neighbors"

Music Piracy

'I hacked into the school computer, and flunked all the teachers out.'

"We don't sell CDs anymore. We sell colorful jackets for the music you download illegally."

"It gets a tad crowded in winter when I share the cave with 100s of hibernating snakes."

"You in there! This is the Microsoft Police. Throw out your books and come out with your hands up."

Computer Frustration

"Thank God! Show me the path down. I've been stuck here 15 years."

"Cool! When I'm dead I want to get uploaded to the cloud, too!"

'After considering the pros and cons of commuting, I've decided the only sane thing to do is live in my office.'

Lost in the laptop...

"I'm going to have to cut your walk short today."

"Hey everybody! Cruz finally got his first friend request!"

'Society of hermits'

"It's not fair. I get 10 years for counterfeiting and people making fortunes with cryptocurrency."