Office Recluse Gifts

'After considering the pros and cons of commuting, I've decided the only sane thing to do is live in my office.'

"Clear my schedule for the next five minutes. I feel the need for some spontaneous frivolity."

DO Not Disturb (Except For Meals)

"Rolled-up sleeves, no coat, loose tie...it's my casual confrontational look."

'I love my new easylife artist's easel.'

#Whyneighborsdon'tknowtheirneighbors

'I think I'll stay in and try to catch up on my reading.'

'You're developing a reputation as something of a cowboy, Henderson.'

Darren had lost his edge as a 'yes' man...

Do not think outside the box!

'It's a sign of the times, a high rise block of caves reserved for hermits.'

That endless instant between initial eye contact and conscious recognition.

"It drives me mad when people act as though we had nothing to do except write moronic memorandum..."

'Sorry, you failed the aptitude test.' -'Thankfully I own the company.'

'We're looking for people who like to take work home.'

The Workaholics Building

'The company was quite generous. They gave me a whole day off for the funeral.'

'Next time you feel like keeping in touch, keep in touch with somebody else.'

'This has been a test. Had this been an actual corporate takeover...'

"Miss Antonacci, please have a regular coffee and a cheese Danish remanded to my chambers."

"The figures for the last quarter are in. We made significant gains in the fifteen-to-twenty-six-year-old age group, but we lost our immortal souls."

"The holidays are finished George, get over it!"

'And I see that Derek continues to ignore our company's dress code...'

"If I could quit tomorrow, I'd be gone yesterday."

"That's it sorted then - this year we'll spend a fortnight in the spare bedroom."

I stamped out smiley faces in your handwritten memos, and by George, I'll do the same with emoticons in your emails!

"It's called a treadmill workstation, not a stationary rat race."

'We've got trouble, Henderson - Your people got with my people and decided they didn't need us.'

"What're you doing? Your contract forbids you from watching 'cute baby video' on YouTube."

I'd rather be at the office.

"I pride myself on being able to walk that fine line between misdemeanor and felony."

"Yeah? Well, tell him that in this company Gandhi-like resistance wouldn't have worked for Gandhi, either."

Frustrated at the office.

Martin hated dining alone – but loved the savings.

"And in order to align the designated objectives withthe fiscally driven cross functional departmental...did you understand any of that?" "Only the blah! blah! bit."