Digital Existentialists Gifts

"Have you ever felt you were just a random NPC in an asymmetrical multiplayer open world survival video game?"

No, you idiots, they don't include a "comments" section.

"If a stock falls in the market, and it had no investors, does it really lose its value?"

"I don't post selfies because I don't want people to feel better or worse about their looks."

"They didn't want to be identified in my photo, so I blurred their butts."

"The low-res JPEG of Dorian Gray"

'Okay, found you. Now let's open the 'Review' link...'

Zenemies.

'What do you mean, I just flunked the Turing test?'

"I'm trying to Google what I was thinking about twenty minutes ago!"

'I have a homepage, therefore I am.'

"Between you, Alexa, and Siri, I'm just in a house surrounded by women who think they know everything."

"We're making a video of us watching TV so we can watch ourselves watching TV...later."

"I've never read such utter nonsense! There's a guy here reckons we're all living in some kind of computer simulation!"

"You need the toilet. . . hang on I think I've got an app for that."

"We no longer have to hide. Bigfoot hunters now only search for us online. It's going to be lonely around here."

"Fact amnesty"

"Today we'll examine that age old question of robot accomplishment: programming or processor?"

'Can you just send the digital copy?'

"Google gets thousands of requests each day to erase links. Most of them seem to go back to my website."

"No, it's not codependency. The neediness is just in one direction."

STRIP Hambone: Humanoid computers

Please stand by...I have temporarily lost my reason.

"The answers to the questions you seek could also be found on Google."

One can hardly be expected to solve the riddle of existence without a computer

'What does the internet have against my people?'

"I need a pitchfork that's just a pitchfork."

"Siri, are Charlie’s parents to blame for his neurosis?"

"You text LOL, but you have yet to actualize LOL..."

To get past the gates of Heaven you have to now enter an internet style password

The Thinker (with a laptop).

'I think I'll wait for the movie.'

Digito Ergo Sum.

"I'm suffering the unbearable loneliness of being right on the internet."

Information Macht Frei