Digital Disciplinarian Pillows

'I want you to text message 100 times, 'I will not text message in class.''

'That website has been blocked.'

Punishment for a child in the internet age - 'Go to your chat room'

"When I turned off his computer, he deflated."

"If I have to text you one more time...."

Computer Room.

Moses on the web

"Isn't there an app for this?"

"In the same of the phone, the tablet, and the desktop computer."

'You don't have to worry about my future any more -- I just downloaded an entire college education!'

"I don't need a lecture Dad, I know all I need to know from the online tutorials of @DamKing61, @HotDam72 and @DamEasy27. . ."

God's Phone

'Your parents are way too overprotective.'

"I have an app for that."

"Only three hundred and sixty-seven followers? Maria's not an asset to the abbey."

"Amen. Thanks everyone, oh and don't forget to subscribe!"

"The problem with online schooling is I can't get help from Mom and Dad!"

"I'm subcontracting math, spelling and geography to my smart phone."

'No, Father, they're not praying. They're texting.'

Follow God On Twitter

'For your penance, download five 'Hail marys' and ten 'Our fathers'.'

'It's Sundays like this that I regret our church website is so popular.'

"We're testing a new virtual reality praise & worship system for the satellite campus."

'What's the use? Everyone has his own PC future-probability program these days.'

'We beseech thee oh Lord, tweet us they word.'

"Where should we target our advertising dollars? "Hold on, I'm checking my website."

'Our church funds seem to be in the computer cloud of unknowing.'

Modern Studying

'I put an app on your computer to remove cookies and other thins slowing it down. It's like fiber for your computer.'

Tiddles completes his doctorate.

You Have 1 New Messages

'In which on-line university will you enroll?'

Priest's computer screen reads: 'e-confession. Please type 10 Hail Marys ... and no cut'n'paste ...'

'To everything there is a season; a time to cut, and a time to paste...'