Digital-age Jokers Gifts

"We're having a problem naming him. All the domain names we like are already taken!"

"Her first word was 'paparazzi'. "

'My dog ate my computer.'

'...And, from what I understand, they don't have any hard drive at all.'

Standard Life Aberdeen Rebrand

Bill was so determined to Twitter no one dared tell him he couldn't do it with a calculator.

Twitter that!

"Grandpa's not tech savvy. If I want to unfriend someone, I say, 'I don't like you anymore' to their face."

S�ance "I'm through to your husbands voice-mail"

"I'm just gonna reach in my back pocket real slow-like and turn off my ringer."

"The x-rays came back, and — I'm sorry, but we found a very large attachment."

Giggle.

People bell ringing - 'RING TONES'

"You're on mute."

"...and we hope that, for a cyber-crime, you will consider a cyber-penalty."

Google signwriter.

Nanopsychiatry.

To begin, click on the bread crumb icon.

'You post intimate details on Facebook, you want to be followed on Twitter, you send out dozens of selfies a day, yet you're paranoid about your computer's camera?'

#NoJunk

"I was hoping her first sentence would be, 'I love you, mommy.' Not, 'what's the Wi-Fi password?'"

"I had a lot more freedom before mom got the drone."

"Honest, D-D-Dad. My report card's 'in the cloud.'"

"The oracle demands the sacrifice of a virgin or an update of its operating system."

"I think we're named after computer passwords."

'Okay! Who changed my screensaver?'

"Bad news Dad, I've just received an e-Alert: The farmer's wife has downloaded a "Coq au Vin" recipe..."

"My daughter is a modern baby. She doesn't cry when she is hungry...she texts me."

"Psst! Strongest hashtags in town, pal."

'Isn't that kind of thing generally frowned upon in the real mob.'

"Hold on, I have an announcement. Facebook password Missywillow 555, please move your car or it will be towed."

"How come all your alcohol is behind a paywall?"

'Before you say anything, just let me change my Facebook status to ‘it's complicated'.'

"Miss, the cloud swallowed my homework."

"Mum, Dad, where was I downloaded from?"