Dieting Aficionado T-Shirts

Summertime Blues

'Darling - look! I've dropped a gene size already.'

'I'm all for a healthy diet,too, but once in a while couldn't we eat something a cow wouldn't eat?'

Chocolate never tasted as good as when I sneak a piece while dieting.

Two books: 'The Joy of Cooking' next to 'The Joy of Dieting'.

All Natural Nothing

'It's perfectly normal for middle-aged men to put on a little weight.'

"When you've lost fifteen pounds...that's when the refrigerator gets returned!"

Man Eating Minimalist Meal

Doctor to man with 'Push' door on mouth: 'It looks as though you've been eating a lot of junk food lately.'

"The saying Use It or Lose It isn’t referring to one’s appetite."

'Simple - it's your high-protein diet that keeps you so manic.'

'Trouble is they always forget to return them...'

'I gotta lose some weight.'

'As you're pregnant, I suppose you are eating for two? Or don't you want to cut down that much?'

'The first thing you need to do is lose 40 pounds of that baby boomer fat.'

'Is your cabbage diet working darling?'

"This is Chance. When he first came here he was a fat Chance. Now he's a slim Chance."

"To lose weight they said I've just had to give up two things. . .food and drink!"

'I'm sorry, Louis. I should have warned you that I installed a speed bump in front of the refrigerator.'

'I think my diet is finally working. went form a large to an extra medium.'

"Double whammy. My weight now exceeds my credit score."

'Did you fart, sweetie?'

'I'm sorry but I have to let you go, we're all drinking 2%.'

Fat man on scales.

Diet Books: Fiction/Non-Fiction

"My incentive for losing weight? I bought a fitted sheet a size to small."

"I'm putting you on a high fiber low taste diet."

'However hard I try to lose weight, it always finds me again.'

'This high fiber diet is great! I've lost 10 pounds since I started eating my stuffing.'

Full fatHalf fatVirtually fat free.

'Id like to see you in two weeks. Try not to eat during that time.'

"I would kill for your metabolism."

'It started with between-meal snacks -- now he's having between-snack noshes.'

'I thought I told you to cut down on sugar.'