Diet Trend Enthusiast Gifts

The next diet fad.

Two books: 'The Joy of Cooking' next to 'The Joy of Dieting'.

"When you've lost fifteen pounds...that's when the refrigerator gets returned!"

All Natural Nothing

Man Eating Minimalist Meal

Doctor to man with 'Push' door on mouth: 'It looks as though you've been eating a lot of junk food lately.'

"Vitamin B6, Vitamin B12, Calcium, Kelp, Brewer's Yeast, Aspirin?"

'Simple - it's your high-protein diet that keeps you so manic.'

'As you're pregnant, I suppose you are eating for two? Or don't you want to cut down that much?'

"They say we destroy plants – such as potatoes, corn and carrots – and they're boycotting us. They're fruitarians."

'Trouble is they always forget to return them...'

"I used to be a vegetarian. Then I became a vegan. Then a fruitarian. Now I only eat manna that falls from Heaven."

'Is your cabbage diet working darling?'

'I'm sorry, Louis. I should have warned you that I installed a speed bump in front of the refrigerator.'

"To lose weight they said I've just had to give up two things. . .food and drink!"

"There must be a place we can wait on line for an hour before eating."

"Double whammy. My weight now exceeds my credit score."

"I'm putting you on a high fiber low taste diet."

"My incentive for losing weight? I bought a fitted sheet a size to small."

"I assume you're on the paleo diet."

'I'm sorry but I have to let you go, we're all drinking 2%.'

'Did you fart, sweetie?'

Fat man on scales.

'However hard I try to lose weight, it always finds me again.'

'I can't see my nuts anymore.'

"Everybody's doing quinoa—at least Kamut still has a nice grainier-than-thou quality."

Gastroenterology - Pull Finger For Service.

'Bad news! More people are switching from red meat to fish!'

'This high fiber diet is great! I've lost 10 pounds since I started eating my stuffing.'

I can't decide what to read, Gourmet or Weight Watchers.

"My holy grail is low-fat, low-cal, high-taste."

"I would kill for your metabolism."

'Id like to see you in two weeks. Try not to eat during that time.'

Good cholesterol cop, bad cholesterol cop. Rice cake? Eat the donut punk.

'I thought I told you to cut down on sugar.'