Diet Appreciation Day Pillows

Roger couldn't understand why his diet wasn't working.

'If you give up alcohol, cigarettes, sex, red meat, cakes and chocolate, and don't get too excited, you can enjoy life for a few more years yet.'

"The chef is going to need more than just your ‘compliments’ tonight … he’s in one of his moods."

'I never should have ordered the diet platter.'

'Wait until you taste the artisanal water. It's not to be believed.'

A small number of people are afraid of heights, but there is an epidemic fear of widths.

"Your soup is delicious. The broth perfectly compliments the font."

Menu Dating

'Take of the fruit and eat . . . Well, peanuts actually.'

'You need to stay away from the pie in the sky.'

"Yes, we have blue cheese. Do you want it in electric, sky or navy blue?"

"I'll faithfully follow any diet plan as long as you also prescribe medical marijuana."

Team Experiences Cabinet: Productivity, Fun, Goal Setting!

'My diet seems to be working great! Do you have any less relaxed jeans?'

'It's the essence of springtime. You're really enjoying it.'

"My diet plan for you is if it tastes good, spit it out."

"Now, in contrast to the last olive oil you tasted, this one is infused with sixty-five more dollars."

"I used to be a vegetarian. Then I became a vegan. Then a fruitarian. Now I only eat manna that falls from Heaven."

Back in 5 minutes!

"I might just get a pie."

'Humans seem to be so weight-conscious: My rider weighs himself before each race...'

'Look, I know it's artificial orange, but you're sick, I say, sick.'

Am Awful Crammer.

WHACK!

Old Spice

'I'm tired of this bread and water diet.'

'My wife's on a diet. So far she's lost her personality.'

'I followed you advice for losing weight....i got naked and stood in front of a mirror...they threw me out of the restaurant.'

"I'm learning to appreciate the simple things in life."

"Here we go again, every 30,000 years or so this Paleo diet becomes a fad."

Thank you

'…and I want you to limit yourself to 3 feeding frenzies a day.'

'I don't get it! I've been exercising for six weeks now and haven't lost a pound.'

Slow food restaurant