Devout Donor Gifts

'I'd like to think they contribute because it's the right thing to do, but I'm not above a short sermon on tax deductibility.'

"I'm in nonprofit work for the money."

"Me? I have a strong urge to devote my life to making the world a better place for all humanity."

"Giving is down at the church, so we are charging an entrance fee."

Set of scales with white family on one side and black people on the other.

The nonprofit dog fight.

"...And please let the merger do through!"

'Sorry - I only donate big.'

'Making virtue its own reward isn't EITHER a cop-out!'

Peace on Earth, Goodwill to the less fortunate...

'Nobody's leaving till I get the offering plate back!'

"Seems like all of Nancy’s nonprofit work is going to her head."

Hire a lawyer - get one free! Limited time only.

'My God - there's two of 'em!'

"Okay, we've donated to the Food Bank, Feed the Hungry, Food for Life, Hunger Helpers, Starving World, Second Helpings. . . is anyone else getting hungry?"

The next step in human evolution was homophilanthropist.

"It's beautiful, isn't it? It will keep you safe."

'The problems with charities is that they are always needing donations.'

A bunch of people with balloons celebrate 'National Volunteer Week.'

"Yes, we're a charity tackling skyrocketing income inequality, but we're also a charity that should be saying 'I love my billionaire finder.'"

"Murder, eh? They nabbed me for bargain-hunting without a license."

'Good Book?'

Thanks And Giving.

'Michael left me because of my extreme couponing...at least I think he left me.'

Give To Tsunami's Victims.

'So, read any good book lately?'

"Don't be so mean...give him some money!"

"The university is delighted with the endowment but is there any flexibility over calling it the 'who's the rich one now you toffee nosed bastards' wing?"

Half of those who made no donations last year 'do not trust charities'.

"I'm a do-gooder, Maggie. It's not easy."

"You do pro bono work, I work for a non-profit, we both do volunteer work... that's why we need food stamps."

Baldo, I really got to know you on my recent visit. I want you to come see me someday. Here is $300. Save it for your plane fare. Don't even think about using the money to buy a car."

"It's called tithing, not a flat tax of 10%."

'Spare change.'

"It's a large gift - a very large gift. So the question is: do we rename ourselves 'Aunt Tilly's Frozen Fish University'?"