Devout Catholic Gifts

'My God - there's two of 'em!'

'Just ask yourself -- Are you better off now than you were two thousand years ago?'

Caption Contest TK

'Great sermon, Reverend! Too bad my husband couldn't stay awake to hear it.'

'I'd like to think they contribute because it's the right thing to do, but I'm not above a short sermon on tax deductibility.'

Monks play conkers with crucifix

'...and another thing, Holy Father, do we call them the 'Falklands' or the 'Malvinas'?'

'Well, for the sake of argument, just pretend you've done something wicked.'

'Oh, oh! They're going to give it to us with both barrels!'

'Jesus? Jesus who?'

'Good Book?'

"I hate these walkabouts. Did you remember to get me some corn plasters?"

'So, read any good book lately?'

"All of my manifestations are currently busy however your prayer is important to me so please..."

"May the good Lord bless this Town Council for the revival of our religious invocations. We thank Thee in the name of Jesus Christ!"

'Is it for your wife or your girl friend?'

'Idiot.'

St. Gregory Church - We will not be undersaved.

New Pope.

Father Ted Hughes.

"ButI thought he was just praying without ceasing."

Pope Benedict - Big Changes.

Papal Bull.

Preacher performs a miracle.

"New drive-thru confessional!"

'I play golf religiously. . .Every Sunday.'

'I feel at peace, Father, knowing my enemies & tormentors will burn forever in hell!'

Never admit you missed church services this past Sunday.

Air for the Pope.