Devoted Dads Gifts

"First I drink, then I barbecue — that's my secret."

"This is where baby gets some alone time."

"Isn't he the spitting image of his Dad?"

Baby has used blocks to spell out 'SO VERY BORED'.

'Mind how you cross the ocean.'

Complete the jigsaw puzzle of your life

"We both see Ben as this summer's breakout child."

Father

'I want to give my children all the things I never had. Then move in with them.'

'We're the parents. What we say goes. . . In one ear and out the other.'

"When Ed suggested 5 potato, 6 potato, 7 potato more, I suggested a vasectomy."

"We'd love to come, but we can't seem to find a sitter."

"A man never stands so tall, son, as when he stoops to pick up a quarter."

"And this is our son Danny's room. Danny is being raised by wolves."

"It's difficult to attract a younger customer when our main demographic is babies."

It's a letter from Tim. He claims his grades are improving and he might even make the DEEN's list.

Businessman with briefcase pushes stroller with baby and its briefcase.

Personal Assistants.

Work Life Balance

'Still having trouble finding day care?'

'More toys! The way you kids spend, you must think bananas grow on trees.'

'He's not my Daddy: He's my great great grandfather...'

"I thought we agreed that the dining room was a buffer zone."

Penguin kid to parents: 'Big deal! You're grounding me!'

"How do you expect him to grow up to be a pro if he doesn't start young?"

'Genius! Art class and snack time!'

'Actually both my kids are twins...'

"My parents are members of a tiny cult that worships me."

Parental Training Course

'He's doing it again.'

"I was raised in New York and Nancy is from L.A., but we're bringing up the children bicoastal."

'Well, we always said as long as he's got ten fingers and ten toes . . .'

'My sales training was right. The person in the highest chair is dominant.'