Design Critics Pillows

"I love our sunken living room except for all the dead frogs that end up in the bottom of the deep end."

'It has a few design niggles, but it's our greenest model.'

Kritik's Korner

'Dang, you were right! It is formal!'

'Teens are like trees, you can chart their growth by the number of rings.'

'Mon Dieu! This year, your collection is really daring, mon cher Karl!'

"Well, your feng shui isn't my feng shui."

"Don't these fools realize they're violating every principle of feng-shui?"

"Did you see that trimmed-up earlier than thou look on her face, just then?"

"Do these puffy pants make me look less tyrannical?"

"At least you have taste when it comes to your computer's wallpaper."

"I'm sick and tired of black."

'That guy is SO tacky.'

'Dude, you like, need to get your wallet chain in check!'

Bad Office Planning

"First the open floor plan, now this."

My Mom texted me to let me know she hates all the fonts she saw this week.

"We went with an open floor plan because it can really facilitate a shared sense of hysteria."

"Would it have killed him to create a screened-in porch?!"

How to recognize a German tourist...

'Isn't it enough to have long hair?'

'Eww, when did this building get that hideous gargoyle?'

Avoid boys who spend more on hair products than you do!

'I'm going to stop coming here -it's completely lost it's fresh, country atmosphere!'

Mirror, mirror, oval in shape, who's that pretentious beret-wearing ape?

Pillaging For Mom

Budget cure

Before becoming an astronomer, James worked in the fashion industry.

'WHO is the architect here?'

'What's with kids nowadays and tattoos?'

Framing. Folks, how about leaving two inches between the picture and frame? More! No, less! the border is a very controversial subject.

"Your problem seems to stem from an appalling lack of design sense."

"No, you can't go out like that. Just because the world is ending is no reason to dress like a heathen."

"If I had my life to live over again, I'd unlearn macrame."

Pants...Before & After