Deli Worker Gifts

"Take my hams, I want to lose them. Take my slaws, I'll never use them."

Sam Ella - Quality Meat

The Deli Llama

The Salvador Deli.

Where 'Turkey Bacon" Comes From

"I think you and I both know it isn't really everything."

"We only do salads. There's no need to keep warning customers that the plates are cold."

Sandwich Shop

A rump of butchers

'They ought to change the name of this deli to The Cramer - they get it wrong 50 of the time.'

'Where did you get the meat slicer? France.'

"Relax! I said I wanted 'a Reuben!'"

Cheese Mystery

'Thinner!'

Deli Special - 2 bean salad: 'We ran out of red beans.'

'I love this job because you customers always smile when you place your order!'

"I'd like to buy a bagel with cream cheese."

'Yo, you in the middle. Roast beef, right?'

'He says he's a 'Sandwich artist' and he refuses to work in honey mustard.'

Special! Hero Sandwich..."No Way!"

"A Picasso sold for $179 million? Any idea how much that works out to per pound?"

End of the day bargains at the cheese counter.

A soldier salutes to a flag cheese marker

Have you heard of a celebrity roast, Lance? The closest I ever came to a celebrity roast was the time I had a roast beef in a deli and Henny Youngman walked in.

Pharmacy. You're supposed to be in the deli, Mrs. White! Free samples.

I'd like it sliced thin for sandwiches.

"On second thought, just give me the ham and forget the roast beef."

"Joe! You in a pickle again?"

"America hasn't been discovered yet -- how about cheddar?"

"...and a half-pound of pain and anguish."

"That dead thing in the corner looks good."

"What do you have that you haven't touched?"

But is it organic?

'Wake up, dear...did you order extra milk?!'

'I'll have the bacon and hay wrap.'